Posts Tagged ‘eejits’

Sister Marie-Simon-Pierre

In 2007 Sister Marie-Simon-Pierre was at the end of her tether. She’d been suffering from Parkinson’s Disease for years and in a final attempt at securing a supernatural recovery she got all her cronies to pray to the late John Paul II. Hoping he would intervene from on high her fellow nuns cried out to the former Pope. This, not surprisingly, did sweet FA. ‘Not to fear!’ she thought, ‘I’ll write my name on a piece of paper that oughta do it!’ (I just made that last bit up. For the record, she’s French). I’m not sure what she thought the piece of paper would do. Maybe she could slip it in his pigeon hole for when he had a minute? So you can imagine her conclusion the following day when she apparently woke up cured! It must be the Pope, it just must be!

What followed was a concerted effort by her fellow loonies to get the Pope elevated to a Saint. The minimum requirement for which is to have performed a miracle. A little bit strange then that we have so many saints, as none of them have performed a single miracle! Anyway, it was looking good for John Paul as the medical staff were unable to explain her sudden recovery. The Vatican had even sent their men in black to investigate whether it was a genuine miracle.

Now she’s back in hospital and Ill again and it’s looking very likely that she’s got a similar disease to Parkinson’s but which goes into sudden remission.

It’s so funny how much money the Vatican spend on all this. It’s even funnier how these crazy mofos will believe anything, including that some old bloke who rode around in a plastic car has cured them from beyond the grave. I think she’s now back in hospital, although, if you ask me, it’s the wrong sort of hospital …